In here, sitting in a meeting, I feel safe and secure. Out there, in the world, I feel uncomfortable and scared.
In here I know I belong. I fit in. I can breathe. I feel relaxed. Out there, life is unpredictable. Out there, things are dangerous. I struggle. It’s tough out there.
In here, I know where everything is. Out there, I don’t know my way around so well. I may get turned around. I might get lost.
In here, I can slow down. Out there, everyone is in such a hurry. I feel pressured to keep up.
In here there is structure. I know how long I’m going to be here and I know what will happen. Out there, everyone is on different schedules with competing priorities.
In here, the darker and more serious things get, the more I feel a part of. When it gets dark out there, bad things happen.
The trick is to take what I get in here and bring it with me when I go out there. It takes a while. At first, what I take out there with me may only last for minutes, vanishing into thin air as soon as my mind strays. But, with repetition and practice, every so often, I find the ease and comfort I feel in here staying with me for the remainder of the day out there. It feels good. It takes a while, but you can do it.
~Carl
Clean & Sober 